Jared Diamond Books

It’s done. I know it may seem like I overreacted a little bit, and, in truth, I probably did, but frankly that is neither here nor there. Because I pulled up my sleeves and dealt with it.

The apartment I’m renting, and have been for almost two years, has the biggest eucalyptus tree that leans right up against my window. In fact, it comes so close that the twigs scrape across my window. Needless to say, that when you wake up in the dead of night hearing a haunting tapping at your window, you tend to think ‘monsters’ before ‘that damned tree’.

Okay, writing that down, I can see how silly it sounds, but I’m sick of waking up convinced the darned Boogie Man is around the corner. I’m a grown woman. I slay my demons. So, after getting the permission of a bunch of different people, I made the crucial step and actually called a couple of different companies that specialise in tree lopping. Brisbane has literally hundreds, but I picked the three or so best of the bunch and, after talking to them, managed to narrow down my choices even further.

In the end, I’ve been thrilled with the guys I decided to go with. I wasn’t able to just get the tree removal company in Brisbane to just remove the darned tree, but I was able to convince them that it provided a hazard for the apartments. Afterall, eucalyptus trees are known for losing limbs every now and then. And yes, I can see that you might see this an example of an entitled loudmouth getting what they want, but frankly I think that’s not a bad lesson to learn. My demons no longer haunt me in the dead of the night – well, not those demons anyway. Hopefully it’s gets dealt with soon.

It was my first day off from work in weeks and I was looking forward to stretching out on the couch and stuffing myself full of delivered pizza. But the kids were also home that day and they were hogging the couch, jumping all over it and screeching at their video games. I looked out the window with forlorn, wondering how I was going to unwind, but the sun was shining and there in our yard under the dappled shade of a tree, a little alcove called to me invitingly. What better way to spend some leisure time than to sit under a tree and read a book? Little did I know that the endeavour would devolve into the need for tree removal, Brisbane specialists would be coming around later that day…

You try to do the right thing, right? I thought, surely this beats sitting in front of a screen, which is what I’ve been doing at work and what I desperately need a break from. Our backyard is quite big and full of native flora, God knows the kids don’t make the most of it, what with their computers and consoles and smartphones and tablets and laptops and you get the idea. So I sit under this great big tree that has been all alone probably for years and open up my book to read. I get a few pages in, quickly engrossed, when I’m wrenched out of the story by a creaking sound from above. I look up – nothing. So I keep reading when a few minutes later there it is again. I look up for the second time and I see this enormous branch tumbling down towards me. I duck and miss the darn thing. Almost got my head caved in by a mega-branch falling from above.

I later realised the tree was full of white ant. I would have to call up a company for tree felling. Brisbane has professional services for tree removal that would give us peace of mind. Wouldn’t want any more branches falling on my head – or the kids’ if they ever do get out.

I need to get rid of the blasted tree but everything that I have tried so far has failed. I don’t know what to else I can do. I have tried to get rid of it through every means that I can possibly think of. I think that I will just have to give up and let this tree stay where it is. It is barely surviving and the people that I had over for dinner the other day said that it was on its last legs. They suggested that I get rid of it before it becomes a hazard to my home. I don’t want to risk branches falling on my room during a storm. If my son is playing in the backyard when a branch falls that could be a disaster. I would never be able to forgive myself if anything happened to him. I will have to call up the experts; and that is what I will do. I’ll have to make sure that the best stump grinding Melbourne has to offer is ready to help me be done with this tree. That tree won’t know what hit it. It will be like some sort of surprise attack came up in the middle of the night and took it down.

I hope that my son isn’t going to get too mad at me for getting the land clearing crew involved. He adores that big tree but I am really only doing what’s best for him. I doubt he’ll thank me for it, but I don’t expect him to. In fact I would like it better if he never knew the little things that I do for him. As a parent you have to do what it takes to put food on the table. I don’t want him to get the wrong impression of me. I am a giving and a loving parent and that’s all he needs to know. I will give the Melbourne tree felling company the respect that they deserve. I might even get them to cut down another suspect tree at the front of the house. Whether I have the money to have this done is another story altogether.